What’s Burning You?

My husband recently bought an outdoor fire pit for our son’s backyard camping party. Last night, I was enjoying the crisp, cool evening by the fire and was mesmerized by the stunning flames. Within in a minute or so this question came to me—“What’s burning you?” So, I decided to ponder upon the question for a while.

There are two ways to look at this question—both very useful. The first way provides us with a mechanism to dig down deep inside and discover (or rediscover) what positively ignites us—“lights us up.” A great way to do this is to think back to your childhood (8 yrs old or younger) and try to remember what you absolutely loved doing. What were you doing? Who else was with you? Can you remember your feelings? Why did you enjoy doing this activity so much? How was it meaningful for you?

Don’t you remember the feeling of being a child…carefree with not much to worry about or fear over? These feelings tend to get tucked away as we grow older and the expectations of others and the world weighs heavily upon us. But, if we can just tap into that fire again (our true colors) and learn to incorporate some of these childhood passions into our lives, perhaps we would feel more fulfilled.

Here’s an example…I recently heard a woman describe that as a child she absolutely loved to dance. Now that she can look back at that experience, she realized that it wasn’t the dancing itself (because she commented that she wasn’t a good dancer), but how she felt when she was in front of an audience, and her interaction with them. So, today, she taps into that passion by making sure that she often has the opportunity to “perform” in front of others in her career, whether it be during a staff meeting, presentation, event, or otherwise. These activities conjure up in her the same emotions she felt as a child dancing. What has resulted for her is that she now feels happier at work. Neat realization, huh?

A second way that we can look at this question is to uncover what negatively burns us inside. You know that feeling when someone embarrasses you in public or doesn’t include you in an activity or gives you criticism you can’t handle? Whatever the “thing” or “things” are that burn us up inside truly provide us with some insights that, if uncovered, can help create new opportunities in our lives that we, ourselves, are blocking.

Let’s take the example of not being included in an activity. I know someone who would “burn up” every time his peers would go out for lunch and not invite him. It would infuriate him, especially because he felt he had a great relationship with all of them. He never spoke to anyone about it though so as not to be seen as a pushover. However, after digging a bit, he realized that perhaps the reason he had not been invited was due to his office door being closed around lunch, which may have given others the impression that he was not interested in socializing or joining them.

So what changed? You got it…he opened his door and the invites poured in! It is amazing how our beliefs and self-doubts can limit us and make us angry in the meantime. And what does anger do? It can affect our stress levels, which can in turn affect our health, sleep habits, etc. Let’s leave this for another blog!!

So, what fires within yourself can you IGNITE or PUT OUT? Sometimes, simple internal shifts can make such a difference in how we feel and how we show up in our lives each day.

This week, I encourage you to light your fire within. As singer and songwriter Jerry Garcia expressed in one of his beautiful ballads, “Inspiration moves me brightly”, may you be inspired and moved this week and brightly shine your light!

Monique
Monique@EnPointeCoaching.com
Helping you succeed in the dance of life!

http://www.AmbassadorsForLifePotential.com/MoniqueCatoggio

You need music to dance!

You need music to dance!

Today, while listening to one of my new favorite songs, I actually tuned in carefully to the words instead of just performing my usual karaoke. I noticed how some of its lyrics moved me deeply and got me to feel certain things that during my normal daily tasks would not have “come up.” Can you believe that in a matter of minutes, just by focusing on what I was listening to, I actually made a shift—a common coaching term for coming to a realization, or having an “aha” moment? What a beautiful thing! I was so excited.

I then thought about what a wonderful tool music is for so many reasons. For me, music keeps me dancing. A friend once asked me, “Do you miss dancing? Do you think of it often?” And, my immediate response was “It never leaves me!" In fact, every time a song comes on—it doesn’t matter what kind of music it is—I see myself dancing in my head. And my soul feels it and benefits from it. So, music helps connect me to my life-long passion.

Another thing music does for me is to make certain tasks less painful. How many of you dislike doing dishes? Well, I loathe doing dishes!! And, since this is one of the only things my husband will not do (he’s amazing…he does so much!), I really needed to find a solution to begin enjoying dish washing. Now, when my husband sees me plugging in my iPod speakers in the kitchen he knows that I am doing my dish-washing dance! Yes, I blast loud, fun, dance music, and before we all know it, the dishes are done and my mood is high and positive! The kids get a kick out of it, too!

Yet another way that I’ve always used music is to help center me. There are so many ways we can meditate, but for some people, like me, finding the time is difficult. Some experts say that all you need is a few deep breaths, or 5 to 10 minutes of sitting quietly to get the benefits of meditation. When I combine these simple steps—a few deep breaths and 5 to 10 minutes of stillness—with music—that always seems to help quiet my mind, relax my muscles, and put a gentle smile on my face. I’m ready to conquer the world again!! For me, that singer is Josh Groban. Or, if I need to jump start my enthusiasm and love of self, then I listen to “Just Fine” by Mary J. Blige. What music does this for you? How can music help you shift?

So, you probably want to know what my new favorite song is, and how the lyrics positively affected me, right? I would be curious too! The song is “I’m Yours” by Jason Mraz. Living in the “now” (through love and without fear) is something that I have been practicing intently. So, when I listened deeply to these words, the reason to live in the “now” was so much more meaningful to me. Perhaps you’ll see it too. Here are some of the words from “I’m Yours”:

Open up your mind and see like me,

open up your plans and damn you’re free,
look into your heart and you’ll find love.
Listen to the music of the moment people dance and sing,
we’re just one big family, and it’s our God forsaken right to be loved.

There’s no need to complicate, 'cause our time is short.
There ain’t no better reason to rid yourself of vanities
and just go with the season,
it’s what we aim to do, our name is our virtue.

Have a music-filled week!

Monique
Monique@EnPointeCoaching.com
http://www.AmbassadorsForLifePotential.com/MoniqueCatoggio